I've been reading other blogs and I've been wondering about a kind way of educating people about infertility sensitivity. Anyone got any good ideas?
Its not just people on the street that you meet, family, friend or co-workers but it doctors and nurses too. When I go to the doctors office and there is a fill-in nurse or a new nurse I try to prepare myself for the question. When they start going over the meds and see that you are taking a prenatal vitamin they always ask are you pregnant and I always have to say no. But I want to say you know how much I would like to hit you up side the head. I would love to be pregnant. I've been trying for almost a year and a half and I spend every bit of my money trying. I wish people out there would just not jump to conclusion or take into consideration that not everyone can get pregnant like nothing.
They are other people who ask all the time. People say its ur turn to have a baby or when are you going to have a baby or wheres my grandchild. I wish people would just understand how hard it is everyday as it is now without those questions.
I have learned a lot through this journey so far and have grown much closer to god but sometimes I don't understand things he does either. Since this journey I have found this wonderful church to go to with wonderful people. I have had a lot of support grow from this but I sometimes don't understand why god led me to working with the little ones. Shortly after we started going to church there I got asked several times if I could help out in the nursery which I was willing to do a time or 2 but it has become an every Sunday thing. When I said yes I new there had to be a reason why god would send them to ask me out of all these people in the church. So I said yes for that reason because I knew that god had a reason for it but it is so hard see all these other peoples children some who are not cared for like they should be. I wounder why god would make me go through this every Sunday but I know he has a bigger picture out there and theres a reasoning but I just can't seem to find it.
A couple of months ago I got talked into being a leader in the Awana group on Thursday nights. I just kept telling myself when they asked that god has a reason, he sent them to ask me for a reason but every Thursday I go and for some reason I just don't understand. I know I do a good job with kids but it is so hard to watch some of these kids who just don't have good homes. Granted some of the kids have wonderful parents and wonderful homes.
Its just so hard for people who go through infertility to be around these things and hear these things. I know I got off topic...it is so me to do that...but how do you nicely tell all these different kinds of people that I would really appreciated if you would not ask me that anymore.
I had to laugh at your "smack her up side the head" comment in response to the "Are you pregnant?" inquiry. I have sooo been there! As for educating people, I am pretty forward now that we've gone through what we have, but I can't say I was that open prior to finally getting pregnant. In fact, I look back to before our diagnosis and realize I was one of those careless people who asked "So when are you guys going to get pregnant?" If I could travel back I would totally go smack my earlier self for saying that to anyone.
ReplyDeleteBut I think you can say something simple without going into too much detail. It at least makes people aware that, wonder of all wonders, there are in fact people out there who can't get pregnant by simply thinking about it. And that each time they tease/ask us about having babies it is actually exposing a wound again and again.
I think its great that you guys have stepped in to work with the kids at church. You are such a blessing!