Friday, April 4, 2014

Where have I been.....

While that is a very good question but in all reality very short answer. Busy!!!!!! A good busy. Busy loving on my 6 kiddo's every minute I can. Why? Because in a matter of 2 months 4 of our 6 kiddo's will be leaving and the other 2 will be going up for adoption. Almost 18 months ago when these beautiful kids came into my home I would of never imagined that they would all leave at the same time. This is going to be 2 of the hardest months. In our 3 years of being foster parents we have never had so many kids at once and we have never had kids for this long. When I found out that the first kiddo was leaving I couldn't stop crying. Yes, I know as foster parents its all goal to send the kiddo's back home but that doesn't take away the pain. Not even a week later I found out that 3 more of our Kiddo's will be leaving. This group is going to be even hard than the first kiddo. It's not that I don't love them the same but you see the littlest. She's my baby. We have had her since she was 3 months old. Its going to be hard on her because to her I'm her mommy and she knows no different.

I've decided I'm not counting down the days that we have left. I'm going to hold on to each and every day like its the last because we may have up to 2 months left but they will also be gone on visits for longer periods of time. If I added them up we probably only have a month at the most left together.
This is not only going to be hard on us it is also going to be hard on our kids. To them they are brothers and sisters. Some don't even know their brothers and sisters they will be going home to. So not only will they be losing us they will also be losing their brothers and sisters.

So for the next 2 months we are going to have as much fun as possible.
We will be celebrating 2 more Birthday's.
We are planning one last trip together before everyone leaves.
Well and just having fun.

If you did notice I didn't say much about the 2 that are going up for adoption. Let me start here. Eighteen months ago if you would have asked me to adopt these 2 beautiful children I would of said yes. However, through the 18 months things changed. You see one is not much younger than me so we have struggled with the your not my parent your my friend thing. One of them also did not like kids coming and going from our home. This is one of the big things that changed our minds because we don't feel our call of being foster parents coming to an end so there would be kids coming in and out as long as God has called us to be foster parents.The last thing is that the teen told us she didn't want to live with us forever. As a teen we wanted to respect the things that she wants. It wouldn't be fair to her because it was something we wanted.

Well 2 months ago everything changed. First it started with her saying she wants to be adopted. Then to asking questions about adoption. Then questions like is it okay to have 2 mommies, does my new mom have to replace my old mom and do I have to change my name. Then out of no where the question, will you adopt us? We told her it was something we would have to pray about. So we have been praying and we all feel like this is something we are suppose to do. Within the next week we will have a better idea of where things will be going. Just because this is something we all want does not mean that its going to happen. There are a few things that could happen. They could be placed with a family member, we could be denied (this is a possibility because of the lack of age difference) and they could go to another family that God has intended for them.

So for the next few months we are going to stay strong and hold on to everyday with them. We also know that God will be with us through this and they could all be leaving at the same time for a reason. We know we can't see what's going to happen after they leave but we believe God has other kids for us and we know that in time everything will make scene and we will see God's big picture. After these kiddo's leave our focus is going to be adoption. We will still foster but we are going to be taking emergency placements so that way our home is open to kids who are open for adoption.

We love fostering but after 5 years of empty arms we are ready to have some that will can call our own and never have to worry about when they are going to leave.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

This was too good not to share...Speak up & Speak out, People.

WARNING; Insensitive people at the Walmart rant ahead. 
Last night I found myself sandwiched in line waiting to check out, this is not an odd occurrence. The woman in front of me had 5 children she was wrangling ( which did not seem odd to me) , as well as the fact that the children were a mix of Caucasian and Hispanic short people.( again hmph...didn't notice until it was pointed out to me).
Yes, I said pointed out.
The people behind me as I wrestled my own whiney toddler, began very loudly whispering things like;
"How many baby daddies do you think she has?"
"Can't even dress those kids for weather."
"Just wait until she whips out the food stamps. "
I calmed my 3 year old with old Altoids found at the bottom of my purse and looked incredulously back at the well dressed, normal couple spouting such, well, total CRAP.

I looked forward to see a woman fumbling with separating clothes items; coats and shoes socks and underwear from the food items with the black plastic separators.

There five kids, two that shared her same blonde hair with jackets and warm shoes and three, beautifully dark haired and deep brown eyes, sad, eyes; wearing shorts, and flip flops.
It was true she was struggling with a food stamp card. Didn't know what buttons to use to complete the transaction.

As the class act behind me deeply sighed; and said "There's our tax dollars neatly at work."

I shot them what I can only imagine was the death glare only a mother of 9 can execute to perfection. 

I stepped forward and kindly said, can I help?
These things are so confusing. 
She looked at me.
I quietly asked " Foster or Adopted?"
I have 9 kiddos...two bio, I get it, please let me help."

She smiled embarrassed, "New Foster Mom, this is my first time using one of these, they came 3 days ago, gonna be with us for a while.
They gave us food, but the kids needed clothes , but no stipend has come through yet.

I looked at the kids and smiled, and turned to her and said; beautiful children I am glad you all have each other. "

I showed her how to use her card as the jackholes behind us snorted.
I explained to her how she doesn't have to separate items and that the items get separated by the computer at check out and how she pays the balance after she runs her card.

She handed each child a new coat , loaded up her cart as she left I side hugged her and told her "you have got this."

After they were out of ear shot...I turned with tears to the smug well dressed man and woman behind me.

"Those children? They lost the right to live with their parents just days ago, those clothes? probably the only clothes they own, or got to leave their home with.
THAT woman? Opened her home to kids, kids that needed a safe place to go, when the one they lived in no longer proved safe enough or secure enough for them. The food stamps, something health and welfare helps an already mother to two feed three new mouths. 
There are not nearly enough women or people like her this world."

I whipped back around and started slamming my groceries on the belt, and then turned back around...
Voice shaking.;
"AND even IF those kids were all hers, and she had a dozen "baby daddies" and was on food child in this country or any other deserves to be cold or hungry, I am sorry, but your behavior? Poorly done, VERY poorly done."

My new 'friends' left my checkout aisle and joined another, silently. 

I grabbed a bag of damn Peanut butter m&ms.... 
As I finished checking out the girl checking me out smiled and winked, "single mother on WIC, what you said? Rocked!"

I grimaced and said "thanks, I wasn't sure I should have gone off like that...hug those babies of yours tight tonight. "

She said " I will, you have a nice night mam' and do the same."

I cried hard as I found my Tahoe, buckled the baby in the car, loaded up...and opened those damn m&m's.

You foster mama's out there...hold your heads high, you are the hands and hearts that are the strong and the steady for small ones when they need it most.
Hats off and so much love today to you.♡♥♡

Author Unkown

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Very Quick Update :)

6 kids + 2 kids = 8 kids

8 kids - 2 kids = 6 kids

10 minutes later 

6 kids + 1 kid = 7 kids

Some day's I wonder why I never have time to blog :) With being a newbie to 8 kids and then back to 6 for 10 minutes then back to 7 but I love every minute of it. I really miss blogging tho.

We love out beautiful family no matter how long or short each of them stay. 

I have a lot of documentation to update then hopefully I can finally update my blog.

Our ages now stand at 1,1,2,3,3,9,13

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Did we say Yes or No?????

We'll after today I will have to admit that I'm officially crazy. Did we say yes or no??? Will find out soon.  :)